Just Let Me Know You're Still Here
by randomactsofles
Summary: Rachel visits Quinn in the hospital after her accident. Faberry/ Puckleberry friendship


Rachel's hand quivered as she turned the doorknob and stepped into the hospital room. Everything about this place made her recoil. She hated hospitals, they always were a cause for stress or sorrow and people died in them all the time but they appeared to be eerily clean. She particularly didn't want to make this trip to Lima General Hospital, because then there was no way of pretending it wasn't real anymore.

The petite brunette had been telling herself that it wasn't really true, that Quinn would text her any minute asking to go watch Rent or Funny Girl together. That she would saunter into Glee Club looking young and beautiful as always. Seeing Quinn like this would make it impossible for Rachel to lie to herself anymore. Her eyes fell upon the unconscious blonde, a stream of sunlight shinning in from her window, making her look more angelic and perfect then anyone else Rachel had ever seen.

She sat tentatively on the edge of Quinn's bed, as though she would disturb her from a slumber.

"Quinn." She started quietly. "I thought you should know, I didn't marry Finn after. When you didn't show up for the wedding I felt as though someone had punched me in the gut. But I also felt guilty, like I was doing you wrong. I wanted you to be there more than I wanted Finn there, isn't that funny?" She paused, starting to tear up, forcing a smale smile. "I told him I couldn't go through with the marriage because I wasn't ready, but really I just didn't have the right person. That person is you Quinn." Rachel took the blonde's small lifeless hand in hers, needing an anchor to keep her sane so she wouldn't lose it right here and now. "And I know you care about me too. So, what I really need from you right now is to know that you're still here, and that you know I'll wait for you until I die."

Tears slid down Rachel's checks and hit Quinn's unmoving, pale skin. "Just...just let me know you can hear me, Quinn. If you know I'm here, just move your fingers, and squeeze mine. C'mon Quinn, I miss the feel of your fingers tracing patterns on the back of my hand on Glee. We were always more than just friends, and I didn't want you being put into a coma to have to admit that...I love you. Then she cracked. Sobs ripped through her chest from being contained ever since she heard about the crash. The accident that changed all of their lives. Rachel buried her face in the sheets at Quinn's side and promised that nomatter what happened to Quinn, Rachel would never leave her.

Rachel didn't think she could do this much longer, it was too hard seeing the girl she loved like this. The only thing harder would be leaving her, which she couldn't bring herself to do either. But she wouldn't break down. Not here, not now. She had to get out of here, she felt claustrophobic all of a sudden, but filled with a burning need to be closer to Quinn at the same time. Rachel had never felt so lost and scared and confused all at once.

She sat vigile at Quinn's bedside until the nurses came and told her that it was too late now, and they were sorry but she had to go. The little girl with the big dreams reluctantly removed her hand from Quinn's and stood up to leave, her muscles groaning in protest. They were very stiff, for she had been sitting in that chair for god knows how long. She took her cell out from her pocket and texted the only person she wanted see right now to please come pick her up, maybe he could help her through this horrible turn of events. Immediatly he replied with a "_be right there babe"_ and she went to wait for him.

Even if she hadn't been looking out for it, Rachel would have known when Puck's dirty old truck pulled up outside the hospital entrance just by the obnoxious screeching it's brakes and engine made. She wrapped her jacket around her tightly to protect her small torso from the biting wind of the night and rushed to hop in to the safety Puck's truck always promised her.

"Hey, Rach." Puck greeted when she slammed the heavy door shut. "You doing ok? I know that must have been hard for you...seeing Fabray like that."

"Why her, Noah? That's all I've been asking myself since the day of Regionals. What did she do to deserve this? It can't be fair. It just isn't." Rachel whispered, for if she spoke too loudly her voice was sure to crack, she had been crying all afternoon and her eyes were still red-rimmed and puffy. Puck however, being the good friend he always was to her, didn't point that out.

"I don't know, Rach. I'm sorry. This is hard on all of us, but we all know how even harder it must be for you."

"What do you mean?" Rachel squeaked, playing dumb, she didn't think people could tell she had feelings for Quinn...could they? Was she that obvious?

"Oh, Berry, New Directions knows you guys have always been more than what you look like. Santana has harrassed Quinn I don't even know how many times about how she can't get her eyes off you and everytime you sing she is rendered speechless! And Rach, c'mon, I'm your oldest and bestest friend. You think I don't know when you're in love with Quinn Fabray? Not that it was a big mystery anyway."

At this Rachel blushed, I guess she hadn't been as secretive with hiding her emotions as she had hoped. None of that Glee Club stuff seemed as important to her anymore, though. Not while Quinn was on her deathbed and Rachel's world was crashing down because of it. All Rachel thought about lately was Quinn, remembering Quinn's eyes, voice, smell, laugh, everything about her just in case she never got the chance to witness those things again. As she remembered the times Quinn was the only person honest with her, not trying to make her feel better, but always trying to help her, because there was nothing Rachel had wanted more than to get out of Lima and become a huge star.

However, if there was anything to compete with that, it wouldn't be money or Finn or singing with Barbra...it would be the girl that no one knows if she's going to wake up or not, in a white room on the 6th floor of Lima General Hospital. In that moment Rachel broke down again right in Puck's truck. Not that Puck had never seen her cry before, they had been kids together. Puck had been the one to get that creepy kid from temple, Jacob, to leave Rachel alone when they were five. He had been pulling her braids and poking at her and teasing her, and Puck came up and shoved him away, shouting "Leave her alone, jerk!" Even as a kindergardner, Puck was the one to lay down the law, and you didn't cross him his best friend, Rachel Berry. She had been the bubbly child, always smiling and singing, her hair tied in some kind of ribbon or bows. They depended on one another as they grew as well. When Puck's dad would come home drunk, Puck would slip out his basement door and run next door to the Berry's house. Then when his dad ran out on them, Rachel was the one to dry Noah's tears and comfort him when he felt terribly alone. Puck still protected Rachel from bullies the best he could, got the football team to back off with the slushies, even if the hockey team was still being a bunch of jerks. They had always known everything about the other, and always put the others problems before their own, because that's what best friends do.

So that's why Puck holding Rachel in his car while she sobbed into his leather jacket wasn't something unusual, because best friends knew everything about each other. Puck knew Rachel was in love with Quinn the day he first joined New Directions, something he made fun of her for, for weeks. Until he realized Ms. Berry was **not **getting over the head cheerleader any time soon, or possibly ever.

"I'm just so scared, Noah. That she won't make it. How can this be happening?" She was hysterical at this point, Puck could barely understand what she was saying. But he didn't have to, he knew what Rachel was afraid of, and he knew he couldn't do anything to protect her from it. "I **need **her, Noah! I love her! She can't do this to me! She** has** to wake up, she just** has** to!" As sobs wracked through Rachel's petite frame, Puck just held her tighter and whispered that it was all going to be fine, and that Quinn would recover, and everything would go back to normal. Because Rachel's sanity depended on Quinn waking up, and Puck was going to try as damn hard as he could to help Rachel through this, because that's what best friends do.


End file.
